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The New Yorker

Humor & Cartoons

Shouts & Murmurs

Actually, I Can’t Wait for a Trump-Biden Rematch

This time around, we’ll remember to stock the appropriate amount of Xanax, anticipating that the election will take several days to call.
Shouts & Murmurs

Other Admissions in Kristi Noem’s Book

“My greatest ambition is to keep serving this great country of ours in elected office. My second-greatest ambition is to duel the Aflac duck.”
Shouts & Murmurs

Arrow Retriever

Arrow retrieving is a young man’s game. First your back and elbows go, from the constant tugging. Then you get tinnitus, from the loud screaming.
Shouts & Murmurs

Isn’t It Byronic?

“Well, life has a funny way of / Creeping up on you when you think / Everything’s goin’ great. / Then, boom, you fall in love with your sister.”
Shouts & Murmurs

America!: A Chaos Demon from the Underworld Shares His Tips on Streamlining Congress

I’m truly inspired by the surreal dysfunction of your Congress—but isn’t it a little over the top?
We provide a cartoon, you provide a caption. Enter this week’s contest.

Daily Cartoons

1/15

“On behalf of the alumni association, congratulations on graduating! Would you like to make a donation to your alma mater today?”
Cartoon by Jeremy Nguyen
Peruse a gallery ofcartoons from the issue »

Comics

Sketchpad

What Sleepy Trump Dreams About at Trial

Mashed-potato nightmares! Kafka in the Oval Office! And other things going through the mind of the nap-happy ex-President in court.
Blitt’s Kvetchbook

Up in Arms at Columbia University

Demonstrations and counter-demonstrations on campus and beyond.
Shouts & Murmurs

Writers, Writers, Everywhere

The protagonist in every movie I’ve seen this month has been a struggling writer of some sort.
Shouts & Murmurs

Anthropology of the Playground

Once you start visiting the playground daily, you will become familiar with the regulars.

Best in Show

Shouts & Murmurs

Some Lesser-Known Breeds Débuting at the Westminster Dog Show

The wire-haired art critic, the American Fox News hound, the labor-rights retriever, and more.
Shouts & Murmurs

Not All Men (Are Golden Retrievers)

Travis Kelce is a mastiff, as is the Rock. Michael B. Jordan is a Belgian Malinois. And Timothée Chalamet is an Italian greyhound.
Culture Desk

Welcome to the Magic Fingers Convention (Show-Dog Speak for the Westminster Dog Show)

An illustrated guide to the Meet the Breeds event, where dog-loving New Yorkers can pet the canine competitors.
Shouts & Murmurs

How My Dog Transforms Throughout the Day

One minute, he’s a sleepy chicken; the next, an extremely demanding teakettle. 

More Humor

Shouts & Murmurs

Reasons That I, a Middle-Aged Woman, Am Late to This Meeting

Lost track of time ruminating on the myriad ways I’ve failed my children.
Shouts & Murmurs

Horoscopes Written by My Mother

With Saturn rising, you might feel the astrological pull of stubbornness in your sixth house. Like when Bess waited thirteen hours before she got the epidural.
Shouts & Murmurs

Board Games for Liberals

Media Charades: Can you get your teammates to pay for the information they need to guess what’s going on?
Shouts & Murmurs

Recommendations from the Guy Who Works at Your Local Dispensary

Turpentine Gelato, Fiscal Daydream, and . . . what was the question again?
Shouts & Murmurs

Ideas for the New York City Officials Implementing Rat Birth Control

Encourage male rats to recount the plots of “Dune” and “Dune: Part Two” on first dates.
Blitt’s Kvetchbook

Trump on Trial: The Defense Rests

But is quickly roused awake!
Shouts & Murmurs

How I Use the Internet, According to Nineties Action Movies

I pull up a digitized photo on the screen. Leaning in, I drag a bright-green box around a detail in the image, type rapidly for a full fifteen seconds, and then softly say, “Enhance.”
Shouts & Murmurs

Stories from the Trump Bible

And Jesus said to Pontius Pilate, “This trial is very unfair. You are a corrupt judge, and your wife is a very nasty woman.”
Sketchbook

Overheard in New York: Waiting for the Eclipse at the Brooklyn Botanic Garden

“She’s a flat-earther.”
Shouts & Murmurs

U.F.C. Fighter on How to Protect Yourself from Being Swept Off Your Feet

The Eye Gouge: The eye gouge prevents love at first sight by ending their sight. This is why the Three Stooges never got laid.