Well
The end of a marriage can be incredibly isolating. But small gestures from loved ones can provide some relief.
When my sister Dinah’s marriage ended after 25 years, one of her friends set up twice weekly “vent walks,” where my sister could say anything she wanted about her divorce — with no fear she was being a burden.
“After a while, you feel self-conscious talking about it,” Dinah told me, “like people want you to move on.”
About a third of American adults who marry end up getting a divorce. But for such a common experience, divorce can feel incredibly isolating, said Jeffrey Gardere, a clinical psychologist in Manhattan.
“It completely changes your life direction,” said Dr. Gardere, who is divorced himself. “You feel rudderless.”
A thoughtful, specific gesture like a “vent walk” can be a gift, he said. So I asked experts for other ideas to help a loved one who is going through a divorce.
Make plans during the toughest part of your friend’s week.
For those who are newly divorced, some parts of the week can be especially painful, said Claudia Glaser-Mussen, a psychotherapist in New York City.
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