I Cannot Overstate How Funny These 24 Tweets By Women Are

i hope this email fucks with your sense of time and space and meaning

— ely kreimendahl (@ElyKreimendahl) June 19, 2024

men love asking, "CaN yOu CoOk?" btch can you change my oil and tire?

— ube (@bbyube) June 19, 2024

In bathroom at casino, asked a lady in her 70s if she’d tie the bow around my waist. My god. One of your grandmothers snatched that thing so hard I grew an inch taller. I looked like a vertical hornet. Much to learn from women who grew up before we had rights

— Honey (@benegotherit) June 19, 2024

before washing my hair: the world is bad and i am bad
after washing my hair: there is poetry everywhere, in the cracks of the sidewalk, in the great ocean of the sky. here, child. have $20 from my wallet.

— erin chack (@ErinChack) June 18, 2024

3rd base is actually when they help you clean your room

— orbeez god (@orbeezgod) June 19, 2024

proud of being a woman in a male dominated field (weaponised incompetence)

— abrish (@cxrnerrstone) June 19, 2024

Didn't realize how few perks we have at the office til I said "we're allowed to listen to the radio on Friday!" to a new hire in a way that can be likened to a girl of 12 saying "I got an orange for Christmas!" as her papa lay dying of gangrene after the Battle of Fredericksburg

— McErin☘️ (@colleen_eileen) June 18, 2024

never related more to a bridgerton character than when cressida cowper broke down in tears because she's got writer's block after only producing three lines of writing in an entire day of work.

this season was for the writers, not the lovers. pic.twitter.com/LvcO1q0MyL

— ayan. (@artan_ayan) June 18, 2024

“I’m in my bitch era” - me writing an email with 2 exclamation marks instead of 3

— Alyssa Limperis (@alyssalimp) June 17, 2024

I keep seeing people write “miss information” instead of “misinformation” and all I can picture when I read it is this pic.twitter.com/CSPpRiuX3f

— Grapie Deltaco 🇵🇷 (@grapiedeltaco) June 16, 2024

human eyes are not meant to see a naked body wearing an apple watch

— Isabel Steckel (@IsabelSteckel) June 15, 2024

I am the eldest daughter of a boomer woman, it is funny that men on here think they can say shit even half as cutting as anything my own mother has said to me lol

— Dead Eyes, Horse Teeth (@thereisnojayjay) June 14, 2024

being home with family is humbling, like they really do think you are the stupidest person to ever be born

— jamie loftus 🌭 (@jamieloftusHELP) June 15, 2024

"its all in your head" ok :) i live in there so :)

— van haley (@vanhaley_yt) June 14, 2024

antihistamine is not enough I want to shoot the pollen

— Mollie Goodfellow (@hansmollman) June 14, 2024

I realized that my dear sweet daughter thought having your period is a *choice* and now she’s crying because I informed her it is not

— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) June 19, 2024

“Don’t double text it’ll make u seem needy and overeager” ok but those r two of my core personality traits like I’m gonna come off that way with or without double texting just by nature of being who I am

— Keara Sullivan (@superkeara) June 19, 2024

if only there was some way to know if the other cars were planning on turning or changing lanes

— tanya (@Tanya_Sabrinaaa) June 18, 2024

whenever i see a woman getting criticized for being mean towards a man, i always feel like she could’ve been meaner

— cindy ✯ (@RUNYOMONEY) June 18, 2024

need a dating app for the ppl whose fave thing to do is nothing. no hiking. no adventure. just ordering takeout is enough for me.

— .:RiotGrlErin:. (@RiotGrlErin) June 19, 2024

My husband told me I act like he forgets everything. So this morning when his alarm went off, I let him get ready for work and leave. He forgot he was off today.

— Nikki Savoy ✨is ON SUBMISSION✨ (@IAmNikkiSavoy) June 19, 2024

Got catcalled** at Walgreens today

**some guy said “CEREAL TIME” as I walked by with a huge box of Cinnamon Toast Crunch

— Sarah York (@thesarahyork) June 19, 2024

i schedule my emails to send at 9:17 or 8:34 or whatever so it seems more authentic. everyone knows what's up with a 9:00 email

— anna (@moonbeeaam) June 19, 2024

thanks for reminding me https://t.co/E9bGPaG1yr

— alison lohman (@ActwithAlison) June 19, 2024

i hope this email never finds you, be free 🩷

— erika (@yeeeerika) June 20, 2024