After a major break up, I deeply believed that if I didn’t transform myself into a more likable woman, there would be no more happiness in my life. So I started to dispose of everything that defined the old “me”-things I did, said, and even believed, and in particular the way I interacted with men. I chose to “de-self” myself in order to please potential romantic partners. After a few years, though, I found that the more I de-selfed myself, the more I hated myself. I realized that…