November 10, 2002

HE'S THE BOY DOWN THE HALL

The office of AOL Time Warner's Kevin Conroy is like a mini rock 'n' roll hall of fame. Gold records from Martina McBride, Toni Braxton, Annie Lenox and Moby line...

INCREASING YOUR INDEX FOR PAIN

REMEMBER that 1980s' hit song "Hurts So Good"? John Mellencamp's classic rock ditty comes as close as anything to explaining what's driving investors in today's topsy-turvy markets. Whenever they are...

STREET'S REVENGE - BANKS NOW SCOFF AT SWALLOWING RADICAL REFORM

After months of being beaten down by securities regulators and congressional committees, Wall Street is starting to bite back. Emboldened by the Republican victory in Tuesday's elections and chairman Harvey...

STYLE & SUBSTANCE: DENIS LEARY

Denis Leary is in pain. "I tore my left shoulder rotator cuff playing hockey," the comedy king told The Post. "It feels like someone drew a knife into the edge...

A DIRECTOR FIGHTS BACK

Mexican director Carlos Carrera has a message for those who have been dumping on his movie "El Crimen del Padre Amaro": "The main threat to the Catholic Church is not...

IS THIS CHEATING?

Now that Aaron is in my life, I've stopped hunting for guys.But when a friend begged me to go with him to a new eight-minute speed dating night, I reluctantly...

MONSTER BASH : LIKE THE WWF, BUT COOL

In this corner of the ring: A man in a red, white and blue leotard, topped with a giant bug head. In the opposite corner: A six-foot-tall can of soup...

HIGH NOTES & LOW NOTES

Candy-coated truth: Forget the married vs. brother-sister debate about the White Stripes' Meg and Jack White. A clever Internet scribe knows the truth: Meg is a robot. Wilhelmina Wonka supports...

SHARIF ATKINS

ALMOST FAMOUS CHICAGO native Sharif Atkins went all the way from the Windy City to Los Angeles to get a part in "ER," a show set in his deep-dish pizza...

DEREK JETER GRABS THE REMOTE

DEREK JETER New York Yankees Shortstop I don't watch a lot of television, but my favorite shows are "Comic View" on BET and "Saturday Night Live." "Comic View" is really...

DEM-OLITION DERBY

NO wonder the Democratic Party's out of luck and the Liberal Party's nearly out of business - they were both out to lunch when they should have been out getting...

STICKY-FINGERED CELEBS' GREATEST 'PINCH' HITS

NOW we know why defense attorneys always want to make female defendants show up in court dressed like misguided nuns. As Winona Ryder proved last week, if you waltz into...

ALL 'JACKED' UP

PARENTS were up in arms last week over the stunts in "Jackass the Movie," or as the Parents Television Council calls it, "the Jackass franchise" (see Democrats, left). They say...

$PERM SOLUTION

SPURRED on by a feasibility study, workers at a Romanian car factory last week came up with a scheme to relieve their company's $20 million debt. Their solution? One thousand...

WEIRD BUT TRUE

A pack of monkeys stormed into a governor's mansion in Nigeria and ransacked the place. Fifteen monkeys invaded Government House in the city of Awka and destroyed the governor's teapot...

CLEAR SKIES FOR QUEENS MOURNERS

Residents of the peninsula near Kennedy Airport find it ironic that they will get a brief respite from the roar of jets Tuesday when air traffic will be diverted to...

EGYPT TV RECYCLES 'ZIONIST PLOT' SAGA FOR ARAB BELIEVERS

JERUSALEM - Arab TV fans across the Middle East are getting a special hate-filled dessert after a day of Ramadan fasting - with an anti-Semitic TV series produced in Egypt,...

RUDY REJECTS MEX COPS SAYS 'GRACIAS, BUT NO GRACIAS' TO POLICE PROTECTION OFFER

Rudy Giuliani may be the man to take a bite out of Mexico City's notorious crime and cop corruption. But when he heads south of the border to wage his...

COPS HUNT 'LOOKOUT' IN DJ JAY SLAYING

COPS want to question an acquaintance of slain disc jockey Jam Master Jay because they think he may have been the lookout for the hit man who executed the pioneer...

COUNCIL ASKS BLOOMY TO AIM LOW ON PROPERTY-TAX HIKE

New Yorkers are going to see some sort of a property-tax increase by the end of the year - but hopefully not the whopping 25 percent the mayor is suggesting,...

1-TON CRANE CABLE HITS BYSTANDER

A rope on a construction crane snapped over a busy uptown sidewalk yesterday, sending a 2,000- pound cable ripping into an elderly man and breaking his leg. Workers at the...

SOTHEBY'S CONVICT IS SPRUNG

Disgraced auction empress Diana "DeDe" Brooks laid low yesterday, a day after she completed her six months of house arrest for her role in a price-fixing scheme. The 51-year-old former...

NEIGHBORS FEARING WEST SIDE STADIUM

Ellen Chrystal, who just this year bought a co-op a block from where Mayor Bloomberg's proposed West Side stadium would sit, isn't happy. The 55-year-old legal secretary recently sunk "half...

HERO FIREMAN STILL CRITICAL

The fire lieutenant who was critically burned in a Queens blaze last week remained in critical condition and under sedation yesterday after being transferred to the New York Hospital burn...

HOMELESS ARE WHERE HEARTLESS NYPD IS

The city is violating a federal court order by harassing and intimidating homeless men legally sleeping on the steps of a Fifth Avenue church, lawyers and advocates charge. The homeless...

'PLEASE DON'T GO OUT': MOM OF FDR CRASH VICTIM HAD EERIE PREMONITION OF TRAGEDY

The distraught mother of a Yonkers girl who died along with two friends in an apparently booze- fueled car wreck yesterday had a premonition that something bad would happen -...

UNION HITS FDNY IN 9/11 RADIO PROBE

An FDNY union official yesterday blasted the city and Fire Department brass for not fully investigating the communications apparatus used during the World Trade Center attack, in which 343 of...

HOSPITAL BED$ORES : 6G FOR ONE-NIGHT STAY AT LENOX HILL

The Lenox Hill Hospital patients guide shows what appears to be an average room - complete with one of those ugly curtains between the beds. What it doesn't mention is...

TATTLETALE IN TOWN TO DUMP DIRT

Princess Diana's former butler is taking his case to the American people. Paul Burrell brought his tell-all tour to the Big Apple yesterday, ducking photographers at Kennedy Airport as he...

ARAB ENVOY REPORTING PROGRESS ON IRAQI ARMS

Iraq may be taking steps to comply with U.N. resolutions after one of their officials met with Arab foreign ministers in Cairo yesterday. Although no final decision was made, Egyptian...

SAD FAREWELL TO SLAIN DAD

Family and friends gathered yesterday at the wake of a Brooklyn restaurant worker who was killed last week when a homeless man plunged a knife into his heart. Dressed in...

HE FED DI'S BULIMIC BINGES: HELPED HER GORGE AMID MARRIAGE'S BREAKDOWN

WITH Princess Diana's marriage crumbling and deep depression setting in, it was Paul Burrell who fed the troubled royal's eating disorders. The embattled butler, in a tear-filled confession airing today...

PRINCESS DI VIDEOTAPE

In a stunning poke at Prince Charles from beyond the grave, a newly revealed video tape of Princess Di shows the late royal baring "innermost feelings" about her loneliness, isolation...

CAMELOT SUNSET

OVERSHADOWED by the GOP juggernaut last Tuesday is another significant outcome of Election 2002: The end of the fabled Kennedy mystique in American electoral politics. Not that this is a...

STRIKE DI'SPIRIT'ING :LIQUOR SUPPLY DRYING UP

A strike by two major liquor distributors could turn into an Absolut bombshell for discerning city drinkers, as the labor strife is causing local lounges to quickly run out of...

MALVO SAYS HE FIRED GUN: REPORT

Psycho Sniper sidekick John Lee Malvo admitted to investigators he was the shooter in at least one of the Beltway rifle murders, the Washington Post reported on Sunday. Malvo, 17,...

VICTORIA GOTTI

DON'T expect Dubya's niece Lauren Bush to follow in the family business. While the rest of her clan was gearing up for Tuesday's midterm elections, the First Niece Monday was...

FISCAL AGONY LINGERS LONG AFTER SURGICAL PAIN

Lenox Hill Hospital helped repair a 22-year- old woman's broken neck. Now, it may break her back - financially. The Manhattanite fell and broke a neck vertebrae in April while...

REAL SWING MUSIC DEBUT CD FOR GORILLA SONGWRITER

She's friends with Leonardo DiCaprio, reads Vogue, has been the subject of documentaries and just released her first CD. She's Koko, the "talking" gorilla. The 31-year-old lowland gorilla, who lives...

PARADISE-BOUND

I'M outta here - off to the Punta Cana Beach Resort in the sunny Dominican Republic - so I won't be here next Sunday. Here's what I'm packing: "Dead End,"...

CODDLED WHITE-SHOE ATTORNEYS SPEW FORTH FROM THE WHINE CELLAR

WHAT would you do if you nailed a $125,000 starting salary right out of school? Aside from getting down on your hands and knees and making a giant novena, that...

VOTING AMID SPECTER OF SCUDS

JERUSALEM. THE U.N. Security Council's resolution on Friday setting a timetable for the dismantling of Saddam Hussein's arsenal of weapons of mass destruction means that Israelis may be going to...

KIN'S AIRLINE FUROR 'CRASH' JETS STILL USED FOR LATIN FLIGHTS

Members of New York's Dominican community, still reeling from the devastating, mysterious crash of Flight 587 that killed friends and family, said the airline involved treats them like second-class citizens...

'WIDOWS' IN COURT: DUELING 'HEIRS' TAKE $QUABBLE TO JUDGE

The marital mystery of a World Trade Center victim who lived with one woman but was secretly wed to another is going to court. At issue is who are the...

NYPD DAILY CRIME BLOTTER

QUEENS A 28-year-old woman was found dead in her bed yesterday after her husband noticed she had mysteriously stopped breathing, police said. Sylvia Kiernan was discovered dead in her bed...

W. GIVES U.N. HIGH MARKS ON IRAQ 'TEST'

President Bush, pleased with U.N. action on Iraq, said yesterday that Saddam Hussein faces "a final test" to surrender his weapons of mass destruction. "This was an important week for...

BIOTERROR ATTACK CONCERNS

Concerns over a bioterror attack in New York City are leading doctors to see smallpox where there is none. According to health department sources, at least four false reports of...

NEIGHBORS' IRE RISING AT W. SIDE STADIUM

Ellen Chrystal, who just this year bought a co-op a block from where Mayor Bloomberg's proposed West Side stadium would sit, isn't happy. The 55-year-old legal secretary recently sunk "half...

3 DEAD IN FDR CRASH: WRONG-WAY SPEEDER SMASHES STOPPED AUTO

Three Yonkers women were killed and a fourth critically injured yesterday when their speeding car made a wrong turn, careened out of control, struck a parked car and smashed into...

WHERE'S THE MONEY? SHODDY CITY TAX RECORDS HINDER HUNT FOR DEADBEAT MILLIONS

Cash-strapped New York City is owed tens of millions in back taxes, but the Dept. of Finance is so plagued by faulty records, it may never collect a dime from...

OILERS' SLIPPERY SLOPE WILL LOWE AX FRIEND?

COLUMBUS - It's great to be in the position where you can hire a friend, but what happens when it becomes necessary to fire him? That's the difficult scenario now...

MIAMI'S NO. 1 PRIORITY SLOPPY 'CANES HAVE TO IMPROVE

KNOXVILLE, Tenn. - For a team that has won 30 straight games, the longest streak in college football in 45 years, the Miami Hurricanes came into Neyland Stadium yesterday talking...

'EVENING' WARMING UP

Jockey Club Gold Cup winner Evening Attire, a candidate for either the Cigar Mile at the Big A on Nov. 30 or the Clark Handicap at Churchill Downs on Nov....

PAWN OF A NEW DAY GMS LOOK TO DUMP TRASH

TUCSON - They come from the city of the "$20 Rolex," so Yankee GM Brian Cashman and his Met counterpart Steve Phillips should be familiar with the idea of pawning...

OVERPAID KNICKS NOT WOR$T

CONTRARY to reports, the Knick players are not the NBA's most overpaid ($91 million), though, if it pleases James Dolan, Camp Cablevision does lead the league in exhibiting the least...

TOTTENVILLE WINS ONE IN CRUNCH TIME

PSAL PLAYOFFSTottenville 28Bayside 20 Tottenville was used to playing in close games. It just wasn't used to winning them. The Pirates suffered two last-minute losses during the regular season and...

OH, BABAE! CHAVEZ TAKES ATHENIA 'CAP

The 6-year-old mare Babae, favored at 8-5 under highweight of 120 pounds, pulled away to a daylight lead on the far turn under Jorge Chavez and easily held off the...

AND THEY'RE OFF...BUT ALL ODDS ARE STILL ON

AMERICA'S racetracks finally moved yesterday to deal with the most damaging scandal in parimutuel betting--their practice of misleading bettors by posting phony odds on the tote board. While the ongoing...

FOOTBALL'S STILL FIRST FOR SHOWBIZ SEHORN

WE'VE grown accustomed to seeing as much of Jason Sehorn off the field as on it in recent years. There was the credit card commercial where he tried to outrun...

NAILON DENIES SPAT WITH SILAS

Lee Nailon is tired of talking about facing New Orleans tonight in the Garden, tired of being asked about any ill will toward the team that waived him last month....

ASKING PRICE NOT HIGH TO HUNT PRIVATE PROPERTY

SINCE 85 percent of New York state is privately owned, many hunters rely on private landowners for hunting opportunities. Nearly two-thirds of the hunting in the state is on private...

NO ARTIFICIAL MOTIVATION IS REQUIRED

On the eve of last week's possible season-turning victory over the Chargers in San Diego, there were some emotional words spoken during the Jets' Saturday-night team meeting. Defensive coordinator Ted...

BELL MAY SOUND END FOR HENSON, VENTURA

TUCSON - In a sign the Yankees are not only ready to move away from Robin Ventura in the present, but also perhaps Drew Henson for the future, GM Brian...

DISRESPECT THIS! MIFFED MIAMI PUMPS UP THE VOL-UME

Miami 26Tennessee 3 KNOXVILLE - Angered by a perceived lack of respect; insulted by a drop in one bowl and in the BCS ratings; frustrated by their own inconsistent play,...

DAYNE HOPES HE DIDN'T FUMBLE CHANCE

MINNEAPOLIS - Ron Dayne said he hopes his fumble in the fourth quarter last week does not erode the confidence Jim Fassel showed in him against the Jaguars. Fassel, calling...

FAB FIVE FIX MAKES ROSE MAD

CHICAGO - If you want to slam the Michigan basketball program for improprieties involving a booster after guilt has been proven, fine. But don't do it because of allegations against...

ISLES MAY BE STAR-STRUCK

Snapping their losing streak may quiet trade rumors swirling around the Islanders, but it doesn't make the schedule any easier. They'd barely had time to savor their victory over Edmonton...

FUN NIGHT? NOT FOR THE DEVILS

This, apparently, is the alternative to methodical, boring, victorious Devils hockey. The wildest, most entertaining evening of Meadowlands pucks this season broke out last night simply because the Devils broke...

IF YOU CAN'T BEAT 'EM . . . BLOWN-OUT RANGERS PICK FIGHT

COLUMBUS - An amateurish and uninterested Ranger performance turned somewhat interesting with 2.8 seconds to play here in last night's slothful 6-3 loss to the Blue Jackets, but not for...

NFL HONCHO ISN'T SELLING IT LIKE IT IS

WELCOME, again, to the Idiots' Picnic. The NFL's otherwise credible sergeant at arms, Gene Washington, on ESPN during the week, dismissed as untrue the fact that the NFL punishes players...

SINK-OR-SWIM TIME FOR JETS VS. FISH GANG CAN'T AFFORD TO BE GREEN AROUND GILLS AGAIN

Whether they deserve this chance or not, given their ugly underachieving first half of the season, is not the issue. The reality is that, with a win over the Dolphins...

COWART HAS A 'SCORE' TO SETTLE WITH RICKY

Look for a lot of gang tackling from the Jets' defense tonight as their primary focus will be stuffing Dolphins' running back Ricky Williams. Williams, who's third in the AFC...

HERMAN'S HEROES BETTER NOT BLOW IT

HERE is some unsolicited advice for the Jets tonight: Don't blow it. Your season should have been ruined. You should have been dead and buried. Some of you played like...

JINTS WELL AWARE OF PURPLE POTHOLE LAST SEASON'S LOSS TO HAPLESS VIKINGS FRESH IN THEIR MINDS

MINNEAPOLIS - There was an edge in his voice, a tone that suggested Shaun Williams did not care to be trifled with. Not anymore, anyway. The subject-matter was the state...

FASSEL'S GOT LOT MORE ON HIS PLATE

MINNEAPOLIS - When he gave away the play-calling duties late in the 1999 season, Jim Fassel freed himself up to concentrate on the entire Giants football operation. He was not...

OLD-MAN KITTLES GLAD TO CONTINUE JERSEY JOURNEY

NET NOTES CHICAGO - He is 28, still relatively young by any standards. And yet Kerry Kittles is ancient in terms of Nets longevity. Of the 12 Nets who suited...

FIRST OFF, NETS NEED TO WAKE UP

CHICAGO - Maybe it's the security of having Jason Kidd on your side. Maybe it's the ocean-deep supply of talent. Whatever the reason, Byron Scott and the Nets are trying...

THE INSIDERS: THE POST TAKES YOU BEHIND THE LOCKER-ROOM DOORS

DEBUSSCH: REBUILD NOW! Ex-Knick great Dave DeBusschere, who won the Patrick Ewing lottery when he was GM, would tear it down and rebuild the Knicks immediately if he were the...

NO BREAK FOR MARTY

Their prize thoroughbred is still the Devils' workhorse and Pat Burns is riding him as hard as he can. Martin Brodeur was expected to continue his streak of starting every...

'WOOZY' MIKE OK

COLUMBUS - The Rangers kept using terminology such as "cloudy" and "woozy" to describe the way Mike Richter has been feeling in the aftermath of being kneed in the head...